Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
And thus, after the successful completion of a Quest, am I gathered on the day after with my dear companions at our table at Some Town Tavern!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
In the afternoon, after our sleepyhead had her beauty sleep.
Red-Shirted Healer
Surely you don't mean me?
Typical Bespectacled Mage
No, I was referring to our other sleepyhead.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
What was that?
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Nothing.
***
Red-Shirted Healer
That was a good fight even if I'm Out, again.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Does that happen often?
Red-Shirted Healer
Very often for some reason. Anyway, I've to go take care of this Out status. Thanks for helping me with my Quest!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
My pleasure! Hire us again if you need help!
Red-Shirted Healer
Okay, bye!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
I'd like to point out that you just let a Healer get away.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
... Damn it, why didn't anyone tell me!?
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Anyway, let's get to today's important business!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Are you going to look for another Healer?
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
No, I'm going to spend the gold we have earned and finally get me some beautiful clothes!
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
I'm going to get clothes to match my new hat!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
I'd better go with you. Who knows what you'll buy with all that gold!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Are you doubting my fashion sense?
Typical Bespectacled Mage
I'm doubting your sense in selecting useful equipment!
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
I wonder what are Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman and Taciturn Female Healer going to do while we're gone.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Who knows?
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Certainly they aren't going to drink all day. Ooh, maybe they'll have found a perfect Quest by the time we get back, one with lots of gold and loot!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Considering her activities the past few days, I'm sure Taciturn Female Healer will find something. In addition, Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman isn't one to idle unless he is Out.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
It's just the two of us now! Like a date!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
This isn't a date! I'm just here to ensure that you buy some equipment to help you in combat!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Maybe I'll find something pretty today!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Seriously, you'd waste gold on useless things that look good!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Ah, I hope there'll be some new fashion designs.
Little Town Girl
Mummy, that lady isn't listening to her husband!
***
Typical Bespectacled Mage
A Fancy Purple Jacket!?
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
It matches the color of my Fancy Silk Hat.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
But that jacket doesn't have enough Physical Defense!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
And it's part of the Fancy Set too!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
The Fancy Set only gives a Charisma bonus which is useless in combat!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Too bad it isn't Silk or it'll be part of the Silk Set too.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Too bad it isn't Silk or it'll at least have some Magic Defense and be a part of a set that boosts Magic Defense!
Little Town Girl
Mummy, that lady still isn't listening to her husband!
***
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace, at least get a decent weapon! Remember that you told Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman that he needed a weapon!?
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Oh look, a Gorgeous Silk Dress!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
What are you going to do with a Gorgeous Silk Dress in a fight!? And remember that we've to save some gold for supplies! We've to restock Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman's Healing Potions!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
What a cute Small Unicorn-Themed Smartphone... Eh, it's not smaller that the Teeny-Tiny Smartphone that I have.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Is this the fabled Berserk Shopper Mode?
Little Town Girl
Mummy, when I grow up, I want to be just like that lady and not listen to my husband too!
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
I've bought everything I wanted!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Finally! You've bought a lot of useless things today! About the only item of use in combat were the Leather Boots of Swiftness, which look a lot like the pair that Taciturn Female Healer had.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Don't be silly, it's a different design. These pair of beauties accentuates my elegant long legs.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Now we should go purchase those Cases of Healing Potions!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Uh, say what?
Typical Bespectacled Mage
We still need to purchase Healing Potions for Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman and Mana Potions for me.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Uh... I think we can afford one Case of Healing Potions with the gold we've left...
Typical Bespectacled Mage
WHAT!?
Little Town Girl
Mummy, I don't wanna be like that lady anymore!
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
We've returned to Some Town Tavern!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
I don't get why I've to carry your shopping for you.
Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
I welcome back my fellow companions, Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace and Typical Bespectacled Mage!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Sorry, Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman, we couldn't get enough Healing Potions for you.
Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
Worry not, my dear comrade! The day is still not done and we may yet purchase the required supplies!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Yes, but, uh, we don't have the gold for that.
Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
Worry not about that too, my dear companion!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Hey, where'd you get that gold? Were you holding out on me!?
***
Taciturn Female Healer
Red-Shirted Healer hired Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman and me for another Quest!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Wasn't she Out?
Taciturn Female Healer
She paid for her Resurrect!
Typical Bespectacled Mage
She must be very rich.
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Can I marry her?
Typical Bespectacled Mage
That is going to be so wrong.
***
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
More importantly, why didn't you wait for us!?
Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
It was but a minor adventure to retrieve an item of significance from Absolutely Disgusting Sewers!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
Sewers!? Oh well, then. I'll look forward to the next Quest. Something that smells better.
***
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Did that Quest go better than the last?
Taciturn Female Healer
Nope. Red-Shirted Healer was Out again. She did manage to cast Heal on Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman twice before she was overrun by Sewer Rats, though.
***
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Now that we've replenished our supplies, there's one more matter to settle.
Taciturn Female Healer
Do you mean...
Typical Bespectacled Mage
Yes, the Quest to weed the Very Ordinary Garden is still valid!
Cliched Spikey-Haired Swordsman
Then we shall attempt the Quest again! With the Levels we have gained, we shall have a greater chance at victory!
Gorgeous Lady Archer of Epic Grace
(yawn) ... Tomorrow. It's time for bed.
Typical Bespectacled Mage
... It appears that we'll attempt the Quest tomorrow afternoon then.
***
Part 4: The Graveyard
Part 6: The Mummy
Adventures of Heroes Who Talk Too Much
No comments:
Post a Comment